Goodbye, Sad World
by Genehh
Summary: COMPLETE. ONE-SHOT Rated T for suicide/death. Edward left Bella, and Charlie Jake gave up on her. One night, when Charlie's out, Bella decides to jump off the cliff at First Beach. Read for more, don't forget to R&R , Bella slightly OOC


No one's here to save me now. Depression is probably the worst thing that has happened to me, but probably one of the best things also. Since Edward left me all those months ago, I've been in this black spiral of death. Charlie gave up on me, so has Jacob. People that I know from school haven't called me either. I'm all alone in this sick, disgusting world.

Jacob had tried to be my best friend. It worked for a while, before he noticed I was too broken for him to fix. He stopped coming over, stopped calling me. How sad of a day was that? My only friend had left me. I am now officially left alone to battle my fears and to dwell on my miseries.

I remember seeing people jump off cliffs down in La Push, some of Jake's new friends. It looked so thrilling that I tried it once before. Jake scolded me, telling me that I should have waited for him before jumping off that cliff. I remember hearing Edward's voice in my head at that moment, the precise moment that my knee's unfolded, sending me flying through the air, before gravity had the best of me.

Charlie had been furious, calling Renee down from Jacksonville to bring me back with her. I refused; I could never leave this town. What would I look like if Edward ever did come back for me? It's been months now. I keep locked up in my room, just laying on the bed, waiting for a monster to jump out of the closet, through the window, or from under my bed, just to give me thrill and put me out of my misery.

But tonight was my lucky night. Charlie was going out to fish with Billy. He hated spending time in the house now. We barely spoke a word; we didn't even exchange a smile or a glance. My truck was left parked in the driveway; the keys were hooked on the wall. I grab my jacket and boots, putting both of the items on, before exiting the house with the truck keys and locking the door.

Before I left, I wrote Charlie a letter, explaining why I had to leave. I told him I loved him and that I was sorry for all the pain that I caused him – and that I was to cause him. I also told him to take care of Jake for me, to tell him I was sorry and to pass on my love to Renee and Phil.

_Dear Charlie,_

_I'm sorry for all the pain I've caused you. I never meant to be such a bad daughter. I guess I just never realized that without Edward, I didn't have a life. He's been gone for months now, but if he ever comes back; tell him that I love him, and that he's too late to save me. Please take care of Jacob for me, tell him I'm sorry and that I missed his company. Tell Renee and Phil that I love them, also. Please dad, do those things for me._

_I never meant to make everything difficult, dad. I just guess that the pain is too much for me to bear; I can't take care of myself anymore. Everybody abandoned me, so I'm left to deal with my own struggles. I love you dad, you were an excellent father. Don't make yourself miserable after my death._

_I'm off to La Push now. I'll be jumping off one of the cliffs that look upon first beach. Don't be sad, dad, you know that this is for the best._

_I love you so much it hurts, and I'm sorry it had to come to this._

_Your daughter,_

_Bella  
xox_

I sighed and jogged up to my truck. I unlocked the rusty old door and jumped into the cab. It thundered to life and I put it in reverse. Once out of the driveway, I put it to drive and slammed my foot onto the gas pedal, and sped towards First Beach.

Tears trickled down my cheeks. It was now dark outside, and it was raining slightly. What a beautiful night, I thought to myself as I looked up towards the sky. Stars were shining brightly. Some people say that the stars are the eyes of God, looking down upon people who needed guidance. As much as I looked up to them, I couldn't see my path.

I sat myself down on the side of the cliff. I put my head on my brought up knees. I cried silently for a couple of minutes before looking at the stars again. I saw a shooting star, moving in the general direction of Forks, and then I knew it. It wasn't my time, I needed to go back home. I could get better; leave this state of depression with only physical and emotional scars.

I needed to get out of here. I stood slowly, but as I took a step forward, I heard a frantic voice calling my name. I recognized the voice, shocked of hearing it. I never thought I was going to hear it again. Before I knew it, I found myself falling backwards, falling off of the ledge into the cold water of the beach below me. I had time to scream a long piercing scream, before falling into the water.

My muscles tensed, and I knew that trying to beat the current was useless. I couldn't move, and I felt my lungs empty out the remainder of air they held. I became light-headed, my eyes started to droop and the last thing I though of before letting myself be enveloped by the darkness was Edward. How I had heard his voice moments ago. It must have been a hallucination.

I knew that once my eyes closed, I was dead. I saw my life flash before my eyes, leading quickly towards the white light that everybody talks about. Goodbye, dreadful world.

I found myself in front of God, my only savior. He greeted me with open arms. I asked him to show me what was happening down below us. He obliged, bringing us both onto the beach. I saw the scene, Edward drenched, holding onto my body, sobbing, with Rosalie, Emmett, Carlisle, Esme, Jasper and Alice by his side. All were letting tears fall from their eyes. The ambulance was on its way, but it was too late, I was already dead. Charlie arrived shortly after me, his eyes widening as he took in the scene.

"NO!" was his scream, before he ran towards my inanimate body in Edwards arms. He took me out of his arms, and cradled me against his chest. He sobbed into my hair, and continued to do so until the paramedics arrived. He had to let go, but insisted on going into the ambulance with my body.

God made us follow them, bringing me to the hospital. I saw my father and my friends sob over my dead body. Charlie and Edward held onto each other, as the other held onto their soul mate. I stared at the scene for the longest time. God brought us back towards the sky. I hadn't realized that we had moved, still petrified by the actions that were happening below us.

One week had passed, and God brought us back to earth. The scene before me was my funeral. The whole population of the town had presented itself at the church, to grieve over my casket. Many welcomed back the Cullens, but others thought they were my cause of death. Everyone settled down onto the benches as the priest came out. Charlie sat with Renee and Phil, all three sobbing quietly in the front row.

Edward came towards the open casket with a red rose. He slipped it underneath my hands and kissed my forehead. Tears splattered onto my hair, and he walked out of the church. I followed him outside. He was in his Volvo, crying his eyes out over the steering wheel. I knew he was broken, and so was I.

It has now been three years, and I've been sitting on the same cloud everyday, looking over Forks. Edward visits my grave everyday, and sheds a few tears as he puts roses onto the earth. He wears a cross on his necklace, to which there also is a beautiful ring. He kisses it and looks up to the sky.

"I love you, Bella" he murmurs.

I have been keeping my eye out for Edward. He prays for my soul at night, hoping that God has been taking good care of me. I've become his guardian angel, taking care of him from a place that only I can reach for the moment. Edward loves me, and I'll always love him.

Goodbye, sad world.


End file.
